TITLE: THE BOTTOM ROCK IS NOT ME - There's a part of me in each page turned that falls away, there's a part of my love left with my kids which has to stay. I wander how much love is left because inside I feel none; I wander how much love this life requires before it's all gone & done. This strength I thought that would last forever; has most certainly met it’s moments through the injustice of loves endeavors. I'm dreadfully broke within these shattered reflections; a enemy I never expected, no remorse or soul, just absolutely relentless. How could this path be a repetition of endless cruelty; how    could I know right if wrong is all this world glorifies while betraying self-loyalty. I'm truly puzzled beyond dark spaces; a lonely trouble which seems to feel warmth in my crazies. Vision tunneled, seeing no victory, only patterns steady gripping a sad & tragic end; a hopeless thought I must survive as something inside craves & hopes for death. What makes me strongest I can not have; as I witness how those shallow perspectives gain the upper hand. If I act in violence against my enemies; then my efforts in God become my eternal lie that corrupts false sanity. I feel as if I've exhausted & depleted my will to fight; like my eyes can't dream no sight to go further in life. Yes I know these words speak shame as if I'm being defeated; but I can't let my reasons feed my demons, it's what I fight to keep secreted. Who should say where falls the blame; as the guilty operate scheming & plotting behind two-faced mascaras. Nothing’s more crushing than deceit by those you trust; straight conniving & guilty of dishonoring all love. I will always fight to keep what I know is worth having; and cry depths of oceans as currents bleed through waves crashing. Can’t anyone see that it's only me, just little simple old me; how far must I go falling before y'all notice it had always been me.