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The Ballad of Duct Tape

Back in nineteen-seventy

The world would hold its breath,

As Apollo Thirteen's crewmen

Faced a fearful kind of death,

Yes, Houston had a problem

But devised a strange design,

Of plastic bags and duct tape

With their rocket-science minds.

 

Duct tape, if there was

An adhesive hall of fame,

They'd only need one room

Every plaque would bear your name,

With your smooth and shiny back

And your sticky underside,

Of all we've known, you stand alone,

Uniquely qualified.

 

If only you had been around

When Venus broke her arms,

She'd have her shapely elbows

To complete her marble charms,

And don't you know those Romans

Could have used a little luck,

And rolls and rolls of duct tape

To repair those aqueducts.

 

The only reason hammers, saws,

And drills are still around,

Is just in case you're in a place

Where duct tape can't be found.

 

Duct tape, if there was

An adhesive hall of fame,

They'd only need one room

Every plaque would bear your name,

With your smooth and shiny back

And your sticky underside,

Of all we've known, you stand alone,

Uniquely qualified.

Dennis Goodwin · 585 days ago
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The Ballad of Duct Tape